Six-Packs and Elephants

Sometimes thinking about one funny thing can lead you down the road to several others. All of this oncoming traffic has made me want to share another story with you about my dear friend Marie. Marie is one of the sweetest and kindest people I know, and fun to be with. She also seems to be okay with me teasing her when we have those funny moments, so I can write about her without fear of great bodily harm.

A couple of weeks ago, Marie was picking us up to take us to one of Trent's post-transplant doctor visits. When we got out to the car, she was coughing like crazy. Okay, she was choking a little bit, and therefore the coughing. Luckily, after a few moments of hacking, she began to breathe better, so we got on our way. "Gosh," Marie said, "the way I was coughing, you'd think I smoked a six-pack a day!" Needless to say, we instantly dissolved into puddles from laughing so hard. I like knowing that I have a friend who, like me, can accidentally turn the words "smoking six packs a day" into "smoking a six-pack." It lets me know I am not the only one. My little Grammie would say that your tongue got twisted around your eye teeth and couldn't see where it was going.

I cannot tell you my favorite Marie story on this blog. No, it is not unsavory. No, it doesn't involve any swear words. It's just that it is so funny, I have promised her that I am going to submit it to The Reader's Digest and see if I can make some money off of her. Hey, I would share! Seriously, though, if this mysterious funny thing hadn't happened to me, I know it would have been someone else's Reader's Digest story.

One evening Marie, our husbands, some of their kids, and I went out to get a bite to eat. Naturally not everyone wanted the same thing, so some got their food from another casual restaurant and we all ate in the same place. While we were waiting for everyone's food to be prepared, I decided to tell Marie a silly joke. "So, Marie, do you know how to get an elephant out of your grocery cart?" Marie answered, "No, how do you get an elephant out of your grocery cart?" "Well, it's simple, I replied. "First you take the f out of Safe and then you take the f out of Way." Marie's forehead creased in a frown. "But there's no f in way." I started laughing like a kid, and said, "Yeah, I know!"

Marie was still frowning. "But, Katrina, there's no f in way." "Right," I said. This went on for a few minutes, and then the kids showed up. (I must interject here, these were high-school age kids. I am no corrupter of youth.) They all wanted to know what I thought was so funny, so I told them, and they all started laughing. Now Marie was getting really irritated. So I told her to just say what she had already told me a few times in a row. "There's no f in way. There's no f in way. Oh! There's no effin way!" Marie, having finally realized she had delivered the punchline, had a great laugh not only at the joke but at herself. And isn't that a great thing to be able to do? This has become one of the happily remembered moments of our shared and funny history. I hope we will have many more. Meanwhile, we will keep on the lookout for six-packs and elephants.